The Dark Side of Self-Care
Joanne Louis-Paul • January 28, 2022
Here to Thrive: Tips for a Happier Life x Kate Snowise
- Self-care is anything that renews or restores your emotional, physical, and/or spiritual energy
- The 7 Types of Rest x Dr. Saundra Dalton-Smith
- Passive self-care
- Doesn’t require much effort
- More restful in nature
- Taking a bubble bath, watching your favorite show, etc.
- Active self-care
- Requires effort, discipline, and commitment
- Things you may not really want to do
- Eating well, exercise, therapy, journaling, decluttering, etc.
- Usually provides the greatest gains Re: energy restoration and well-being
- Self-care can be used as an excuse to continue maladaptive coping behaviors
- Procrastination
- Avoidance
- Numbing out
- Not everything that looks healthy is healthy
- Overinvesting in either takes something restorative and makes it damaging
- If your future self won’t thank you for it, it’s not self-care
- Overinvesting in passive self-care - can be used as an excuse to bail out on life’s responsibilities
- Binging Netflix and deprioritizing sleep
- Overindulging in your favorite treats
- Reading books while ignoring your family
- Overinvesting in active self-care - can be used as an attempt to control things
- Obsessing over nutrition to the point where joy is lost
- Overexercising
- Obsessing over self-care routine and self-improvement, leading to anxiety
- How to avoid the dark side of self-care
- Ask yourself -
- Is this nourishing and restoring me?
- Will my future self thank me for this tomorrow and the next day?
- Is this self-care or am I just numbing out or being avoidant?
- Am I ultimately being kind to my mind, body, and spirit?
- If there’s any doubt, be honest with yourself and explore it further
- Don’t overcorrect
- Push back against the productivity and perfection culture











